Does the money really matter?

           I chose to write on something so controversial and popular, or so it seems. It has become a growing trend in the Nigerian community, both here in the U.S and in Nigeria. Girls dating men for one sole purpose, maybe two; money and fame. Contrary to popular beliefs,
most girls that find themselves in such situation don’t all come from poor backgrounds, most of them come from homes where a vacation in a foreign country once a year was the norm. You might ask why they’d get involved in a relationship for financial gain. For reasons best known to them, most of these girls will do anything just to be satisfied materially. They’ve turned relationships into a business. 

Every day I look through my Instagram account, I see girls that I know have no jobs, who come from humble homes, splurge on trips to different countries, The UAE, England, France, Italy etc. Being the person I am, depending on my relationship with the person, I’d ask them jokingly “Ah, when will you buy my ticket so I can enjoy this new found wealth with you”, they reply with the normal “My sister, na God o”. Yea, it is God that provides. Some go as far ar sleeping with men as old as their fathers all in the name of a relationship and to be on the same level as their “big girl” friends. 

Relationships have become a competition to see whose boyfriend can buy the best presents, spend lots of money on lavish trips, throw the best parties, mingle with top celebrities. Two years ago (When the Blackberry craze was going on in Nigeria) I allowed my childhood friends and cousins convince me to get a blackberry, something which is used mainly for business here in the U.S. When I got the phone, I was hesitant to give out my pin but trust people, before I knew it, every Tom, Dick and Harry had my pin. From primary school classmates, to teachers that didn’t like me in Secondary school. (Or so I thought) I had a very funny encounter with a girl I went to primary school with. She claimed she was in my class and she used to talk to me a lot, but I have no memory of her. She sent me a message one day, expressing how she was broke and if I could do anything to help her out as she had been living off money she borrowed from her friends. I told her not to worry, that I’d find one of my generous friends that could help her out. I guess this reply opened a door I wished it didn’t. She went ahead to ask if I could hook her up with one of my “rich friends”. I was so surprised and thought it was funny.

 Coincedentally, one of my guy friends had been asking me to hook him up with one of my friends so I thought this was the perfect opportunity. I gave him her pin and they began talking. Everything was going fine until he pinged me at 2am one morning. He sounded so angry and dissapointed. According to him, they went out on a date and everything was going great until she asked him to give her some money, 50,000 Naira to be exact so she could repair her phone and go shopping. He wasn’t angry at her request, what angered him was her demeanor after he said he wouldn’t be able to give it to her at that moment. It seemed as if she had lost interest in him entirely. I was embarrassed for her. I couldn’t get myself to confront her about it but I summoned the courage to ask her one day and of course she became defensive until I hit her with the “You tried to use me and I refuse to let you embarrass me like that”. I went ahead and told her that I wasn’t going to play matchmaker anymore. Long story short, that experience made me realise how financial relationships have become. 

Don’t get me wrong, every good girl deserves to be treated like a queen but when the sole intention of a relationship is for money, things go bad very fast. Does the money really matter so much? What happened to genuine relationships? Most of our parents weren’t this stable and well to do when they got married. This love for money is leading most of the youths astray and killing possible bright futures then again I ask Does money really matter?