What kind of friend are you?

 

Whether you like it or not your friends see you in a certain way; you could be either at the top or the bottom of their priority list, you could be the last thought on their mind before they go to bed or the first thought that makes them want to let out a torrent of abuses, or you could be the one who they think of going out of their way for to buy a birthday gift or the one whom they can’t even be bothered to drop an ‘HBD’ one-liner on your Facebook page wall (is that what they call it these days?). It all begs the question ‘What kind of friend are you to your friends?’

1. The Hangout friend – Some of your friends might just see you as the one they call when they want to have a good time at the restaurant, club, bar, ice-skating rink, movies (you get my drift). A night on the town is fun with you (and a night on the prowl is equally fun with you). They don’t see you as indoor person and you’re usually the same person they turn to for advice on hangout spots and 9 outta 10 you’re the one who plans get-togethers for your friend circle.

2. The Make out friend – You may have a friend or two who don’t want to be in a serious, committed relationship but still want to be able to kiss and caress you every time from time to time. A more common term used to describe this arrangement is ‘Friends with benefits’ and ‘No strings attached’. Whether or not they want to be seen in public with you is an entirely separate matter. You’ll find that if you’re this type of friend to someone it doesn’t usually last long…or at least one of you gets into a relationship.

3. The Handout friend – Your friends would looooooooove you if you were this type of friend. I mean, who wouldn’t? Every time you all go out the drinks are on you. You have dinner and the bill is on you. You throw parties every now and again where your friends are not compelled to bring so much as a complimentary bottle of wine (cheapskates!). Best (or worst) of all they see you as the person they can ask for soft loans or what I like to call N.G.P.B loans (‘Never Gonna Pay Back’ loans). Note: They will definitely be coming round for Christmas!

4.The Opt out friend – Maybe you’re the one who likes to always turn down invitations to weddings, parties, church functions, dinners, etc. You’re the one who never wants to contribute money to any group investment where you all stand to benefit. You’re more than likely to receive fewer invitations as time goes by (and then you’re dependent on social media for updates on what your friends are up to).

5.The No doubt friend – To some of your friends you could be seen as the one whom they can count on no matter what. Are they stranded in the Kalahari desert? You’ll be quick to the rescue. Are they in dire need of a kidney donor? You’re already taking your shirt off and jumping on the operating table. Once you’re around everyone around you has peace of mind knowing full well that you are in control, you are dependable and you are solid as a rock. Everyone needs to have at least one friend like this but they’re hard to come by.

6. The Mad about friend – It could be that you’re so loyal, eloquent, well-dressed, good-looking, fun to be with, the one who can do no wrong – if that’s you then you’re probably no. 1 on their priority friends list. They’re borderline obsessed with you and in extreme cases you have to beat them off with a stick. They want to be in all your business all the time.

7.The Talk about friend – Now if you’re this type of friend it could be a hit or miss. If you’re up to no good they’ll be talking about you and spreading exaggerated rumours. You probably refer to them as haters. On the other hand, if you’re trail blazing and moving on up in life they will be speaking well of you and even boasting that they know you personally (persona-personally – Naija peeps will get this). You don’t have to be a celeb to be this kind of friend. Just keep doing controversial stuff and you’re bound to get your friends’ attention.

8. The Inside Out friend – Are you the friend that knows everything about your friends? You know their birthdays, their strengths and weaknesses, their phobias and pet peeves, and so much more than they could ever know about themselves. You have to be someone who is trustworthy for your friends to be able to divulge their deepest, darkest secrets.

9. The Time Out friend – Your friends turn to you when they’ve had a long, stressful day or they’ve just come out of a nasty break-up or they want to just escape from the seriousness of life for a moment and just chill out with you. When the going is good they may not be in touch very much but once things start to go a bit ‘Pete Tong’ your phone number is right on their fingertip.

It’s quite possible to be one or even all of these friend types to your various friends. Which friend do you think you are to most of your friends?