Why you get bored in your relationship

 

Most of us have a bad habit of basing a lot of our romantic decisions on how we feel at a particular time. We call this following our heart. And to top it off we also say ‘the heart wants what the heart wants’.

We do not waste time considering how this will work on a long term scale. How many times have you heard someone say things got bad when they moved in together? You might really like someone when you periodically see them, but both of you are completely incompatible sharing a living space.

Just imagine having to live with someone else for pretty much every day of your life. When you wake up they will be there, and when you are going to sleep they will be there. You will probably have to eat dinner with them every day. If you cannot get on with this person effortlessly you are in for a rough ride. Most of the time we do not place enough emphasis on the need for quality conversation. It is far more important than good sex if you are thinking long term and the leading cause of boredom. Just imagine being having a meal in the nicest restaurant with only the clinking of cutlery for conversation, or even worse someone on the other end boring you with every topic but the ones you like to talk about.

Most people that have been through a long term relationship will tell you about how it became boring. And no matter how hard they tried to spice it up, it just wasn’t happening. People say ‘the relationship’ got boring. No, you got bored. To connect with another person in such a way that on a day to day basis they can continue to spike your emotions is very rare. This is firstly a matter of compatibility for companionship before anything sexual. You can try introducing a thousand and two things in the bedroom, sexual energy will eventually burn out even if just to make room for the rebirth of another cycle of sexuality

For a lot of young people we meet partners while we are still growing. Naturally this means we are still changing as we find ourselves in the world. Sometimes we grow and grow apart and this can make things boring too. If there is any moral here, I would say think shared values and shared interest in choosing a date.

P.S If nothing is happening, boredom is happening.